Top Five: Games That Are Inadvertently Impossible to Beat

There’s this rough statistic that’s floated around since 2011, which claims that 90% of players who start a video game won’t actually see it through to completion. Admittedly, the data backing this particular percentage appears to never have been made transparent, and I reckon it’s high time someone took a fresh look at more recent numbers. All that being said – and regardless of exact accuracy – the takeaway here is still clear: Most games go unbeaten by the bulk of their players. Between the necessary time investments, overwhelming number of constant new releases, and general public fickle; it’s honestly a wonder that there’s anyone left who can still find the time to finish video game campaigns.

It’s not as if developers can just use that as an excuse to not bother including endings to their games, though. The expectation when a player begins a narrative-driven [or otherwise “end goal” motivated] game should naturally be that there’s some goal they’re working towards, or a finish line they’re intended to cross. And if a player should find themselves so compelled by the story or engaged by the gameplay, they should be treated to some sort of conclusion or congratulation for their commitment to it. I’m realizing now that I’m over-explaining what is a pretty basic design concept here, in that “players should be able to get to the end of a game.” But wouldn’t you know it: Some developers occasionally forget to double-check their work before release!

In this list, we’re looking at a selection of titles that are unintentionally impossible to beat; whether thanks to programming errors, poor design, or other manner of perfunctory oversights. While there are a handful of game releases out there in the world which have actually been confirmed to have been developed with deliberately impassible points – whether to hide unfinished work or to simply spite players – I’m gonna call that a list for another day. And so, we’re running under the assumption here that these titles were simply not sufficiently playtested, rather than their intentionally being made impossible to finish. Or maybe one day, it’ll come out that one of the games on this list actually was purposefully sabotaged as part of some cruel joke on players, and I’ll have to eat crow? Only time will tell.

Obviously, we’re discounting arcade-style games that aren’t meant to end / be “beaten” in the traditional sense, here.

Dishonorable Mention: I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream (German / French release)

Cyberdreams / The Dreamers Guild, 1995

I reckon I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream is generally regarded as one of the best point-and-click adventure titles of all time. It may also well be one of the most dour and depressing to boot, but that’s the appeal for some, I suppose. Unfortunately, this creative direction also pretty much condemned the original release of the game to a limited audience and underwhelming sales, so go figure. In any case, the reason it only lands as a dishonorable mention on this list is because it’s something like a fringe case; where the game actually features a veritable suite of multiple endings, and where most of the world had full access to the full lot of them… All but for two European countries, who reportedly lost out on the ability to earn the game’s “best” ending.

For an incredibly oversimple summary of the game’s premise: The last five humans on Earth are endlessly tortured by an evil artificial intelligence named “AM,” and subjected to cruel simulations designed by the AI to center on their fears and perceived misdeeds. While exploring these simulations, a pair of other still-operational supercomputers (hailing from Russia and China) hack in to help guide the humans, for the purpose of undermining and arresting control from AM. And so, over the course of these character-tailored adventures, you’ll stumble across items and knowledge that will eventually come into play during the endgame, as you work to disable your tormentor. As a more pointed spoiler as to what this entails: You pick from your characters to explore the metaphorical representation of AM’s “brain,” and work to disable several of its components, before a final series of choices which determine the very fate of mankind.

There’s a catch though to the German and French releases of the game. You see, one of the five simulation scenarios takes place in a Nazi concentration camp, as the character Nimdok is a former “physician” / had a hand in the atrocities that occurred there. Though the game only refers to the Nazi party as “the Regime,” and swastikas are replaced with AM’s own banner, the allusions being made here are entirely clear — to the point where you literally interact with Josef “Angel of Death” Mengele, who was once a personal friend to your playable character. With the depiction of these horrors and the monsters responsible for it being so prominent, German censorship laws regarding Nazi imagery precluded it all from appearing in that region’s release in any form (as well as evidently affecting the French localization). And thus, Nimdok’s simulation is removed entirely from the game, rather than attempting to individually censor / change all the components of this scenario.

Unfortunately, this causes an unforeseen issue when it comes to achieving the best ending, as Nimdok’s knowledge of a numerical passcode (“1945”) must be learned during his chapter and entered into a terminal during this final phase. With no other way to bypass this obstacle, the best ending is effectively taken off the table. Cue the cries of “censorship” ruining a classic video game, and never mind the German government’s concern at the time that permitting explicit Nazi imagery in games may have opened the floodgates for more nefarious folk (ie; Nazi-sympathizing scumbags) to use those same symbols and images in order to rally folk back around it.

… But wait just a moment, as I have reason to believe that this long-standing and oft-shared instance of an inaccessible video ending is a big ol’ load of bull-honkey! See, the thing that most folk seem to forget is that the other selectable characters can actually figure out the password as well; narratively justified as them recalling AM mentioning the year 1945 (after inputting a series of failed guesses at the terminal). Alternatively, if you as a player already happen to know that the passcode is 1945, you can just type it in as any of the given characters and have it grant you access immediately. Problem solved. Thusly, I’m filing this one under the “Dishonorable Mention” slot; in the hopes of potentially dispelling this myth, and also dissuading anyone from mentioning it in this article’s comments.

5. Savage (C64)

Firebird Software / Probe Software, 1988

Through the mid-to-late 80s, Probe Software were a mainstay of the microcomputer games scene. While the bulk of their work was in conversions of arcade standards and titles originally developed for other computing platforms of the era, they did find time to put out a handful of original software — the likes of which included BraveStarr, Trantor the Last Stormtrooper, and the subject of this particular entry to our list: 1988’s Savage. Pitting players in the boots of a massively buff titular character – billed on the box as “The Supreme Fighting Machine” – your mission is to escape from a perilous castle, and then turn around to go back to it when you discover that you left a fair maiden behind. This adventure is played across three levels, each featuring a different style of gameplay: Side-scrolling platforming, first-person rail shooting, and a conclusionary maze-exploration segment where you play as Savage’s pet eagle. This last bit is the part we’re gonna focus on here.

Your goal in playing as the “Eagle Warrior” is to search for and collect four treasures from within the castle, with which Savage will be able to bribe a jailer to free the maiden. Why Savage cannot simply beat the jailer into submission or break down the prison walls, I do not know. What I do know is that in the Commodore 64 version of the game, a variable in the code that is meant to be flagged when you collect one of the four pieces of treasure doesn’t activate properly; thereby rendering it impossible to pass the check at the jailer, and therefore making it impossible to beat the game. What makes this all the more frustrating is that this is the literal last thing you need to do to finish the game, as the victory screen is meant to be waiting on the other side of the jail cells! The phrase “black-flagged on the last lap” comes to mind.

Luckily (?), this seems to be the only conversion of the game affected by this issue; and so there do exist accessible ending screens for the other versions of the game, to give you an idea of what you may have missed out on. Of note is the fact that the ZX Spectrum and Amstrad CPC conversions seem to completely discount the idea that your quest even revolved around the idea of rescuing a maiden, as she goes uncounted among your other “fellow prisoners?” Oh, and then they go on to assume that you probably cheated in order to beat them, and command you to “PLAY THE LEVELS AGAIN PROPELY [sic] CHICKEN.” Rad.

As it turns out, the Commodore 64 was home to a number of unbeatable game releases. While the most notable of these is likely Ocean Software’s 1989 RoboCop release, I’ve disqualified it from this particular list due to millings that it was made deliberately impossible — in order to hide the fact that the final stages of the game remained unfinished come the end of the development timeline. For more pointed details on that and several other titles (including Savage again); I recommend this article on VintageIsTheNewOld.com, chronicling a handful of broken C64 titles.

FUN FACT: The ZX Spectrum and Commodore 64 releases of Savage were published by prolific British software label Firebird. This marks their second appearance on this website, as they had previously seen fit to publish the infamous compilation cassette Don’t Buy This. This also marks the second appearance of developer Probe Software here, as one of their later conversion works saw them bringing Mortal Kombat to the Game Boy [to disastrous result].

4. Tokyo Xtreme Racer 3

Crave Entertainment / Genki Co. Ltd., 2003

Originally named as Shutokō Battle in its native Nihon, publisher Crave Entertainment would bring this series of Japan-centric street racing titles to North America under the “Tokyo Xtreme Racer” banner. With the third entry in the series – confusingly titled Shutokō Battle 01 (blame a number of spin-offs and prequels) – the traditions of illegal racing and depthful car tuning seemed to continue as strong as ever, resulting in… another decently well-received title in an altogether pretty average series?

I’ve looked into it, and there doesn’t really seem to be any one entry in the series that’s really considered to be particularly stellar, or even all that measurably better than its own predecessors or sequels. I get the impression that the series managed to carve out a handy little niche for itself among driving fans who lean towards the street racing theme, and who in particular are enamored by the aesthetics of the Japan cityscape. But outside of those circles, I don’t honestly reckon the franchise managed to garner much traction (no pun intended). So, by the time we’re looking at a the third – wait, actually, make that “fifth” – title in the series to see release in North America, I get the feeling that the localization team were pretty content to just phone things in and rush the whole package out the door. And here, of course, is where our issue arises.

See, the goal of the game is to challenge and defeat a series of race rivals situated in three of the different cities: Tokyo, Nagoya, and finally, Osaka. Clearing out these rivals and declaring victory over their associated teams eventually earns you the reputation necessary to challenge the leaders of said teams, and to further progress through the game. By the time you’re tearing up the streets of Osaka, you’ve come pretty far in the grand scheme of things, and probably amassed a decent little fortune for yourself. That last bit is actually pretty important, as one rival in particular (one “Whirlwind Fanfare”) will only appear to challenge you if you’ve managed to amass 100 million “CP” — presumably standing for “Currency Points” or something to that effect, and likely converting to an equivalent sum of yen.

Now, here in the good ol’ US of A, we don’t toy around with none of that stinky foreign currency, no siree bob. Naw, see, if you’re gonna release a racing game over here set in this so-called country of “Japan,” you’d better well convert their fake money into cold, hard, American cash dollars! And that’s exactly what the team behind transliterating this here game did, god bless ‘em. Only, one small problem: In the process of converting JPY to USD, they also went and set the currency cap at 99,999,990 CP. Because obviously, the idea of some street-racing punk accumulating a whole nine-digit sum of dollars was just too unbelievable, whereas rounding down to a more quaint eight-digit total makes the pill a fair bit easier to swallow. Unfortunately, they also forgot to subsequently adjust the minimum requirement for challenging that one aforementioned rival to a value below 100,000,000, which makes it impossible to race against them or progress the game any further. Did I already use the phrase “black-flagged on the last lap” earlier?

The first entry in the series to see release outside of Japan would be 1996’s Shutokō Battle: Drift King for the PlayStation and Saturn; which found itself translated and re-published as Tokyo Highway Battle by Jaleco for its North American release. It was with 1999 and the Dreamcast release of the simply-titled Shutokō Battle that Crave grabbed the NA / EU publishing rights to the franchise, and began using the “Tokyo Xtreme” branding.

3. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (DOS)

Ultra Games / Unlimited Software, 1990

Remember that first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles game for the NES, which everyone seemed to universally decide at a certain point was kind of shit? Well, I’ve always liked it, and I still do consarn it! I mean, I’d be hard-pressed to call it Konami’s best effort on the console in the same year that gave us no less than Castlevania III: Dracula’s Curse; but it’s still a charming little game that’s only occasionally derailed by gigantic spikes in difficulty and clumsy design. In any case, it ended up selling pretty darn well for itself, even if only on the merit of its incredibly popular title license. And where there are successful games, there are conversions of them to other platforms.

Unsurprisingly, Konami (or “Ultra Games” if you’re feeling frisky) elected to outsource conversion work to multiple other studios, so that they might continue to devote internal resources to however many other original titles they were working on at the time. Hell, they didn’t even bother to do the MSX version of the game in-house, despite the fact they actually did have a team devoted to developing for that hardware. But here, our interest is in the version of the game developed for DOS computers, as created by Canadian software collective Distinctive Software Inc — obfuscated by release under their secondary “Unlimited Software Inc.” label. Proper crediting aside, this version of the game is certainly serviceable enough, I suppose: About as decent as you could hope for in a pre-Commander Keen DOS game. The jumping and platforming are as miserable to mitigate as ever, so they certainly managed to nail that bit accurately!

As you continue along, and should you somehow manage to clear the “”impossible”” dam stage (the one where you’re disarming bombs underwater and dodging electrified algae), you get to the third area of the game; where you navigate through another series of city streets, alternating between steering your Party Wagon™ and trekking through buildings and sewers on-foot. It’s when you wind up in one particular sewer stage that the game takes something of a turn for the truly impossible, with a passage necessary to progressing the game that presents an impassable gap. With an overhead tile that prevents you from reaching the required height of your jump needed to make it to the next platform, you’re doomed to fall into the sewage in-between, and get dumped back out onto the overworld. You can try this jump again and again – only having to re-enter the building and hoof it back to the troublesome screen – but no angle or permutation will see you able to make it across. And so, without the use of some sort of hacking or cheating (or one of a pair of remaining debug codes discovered years later), the Turtles’ adventures end here.

With a latter PAL revision of the game – re-titled “Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles” as per inane British law – this particular issue is fixed, and the game is rendered fully finishable. But the fact that this issue was even able to get past the publishers and developers in the initial series of playtesting and certification is testament to how little consideration was actually paid to North America’s computer-platformer market at the time. For a further, in-depth analysis of this particular game-breaking oversight; a YouTube channel “Displaced Gamers” put out an extensive study on “The Impossible Jump” in video form.

2. Jet Set Willy

Software Projects, 1984

Up ‘til now, the titles on this list (or at least the particular versions of them) have all been fairly obscure. But when you hear the name Jet Set Willy, you might be pretty quick to recognize it — especially if you happen to hail from the United Kingdom. As the sequel to the immensely popular Britsoft release Manic Miner, Jet Set Willy would find similar success and pop culture relevancy, and further be hailed as one of the most important British microcomputer titles of all time. It’s legacy and reputation are that much more surprising when you discover that when it first released, you couldn’t even finish the damn thing due to a severe programming issue!

Over the course of Miner Willy’s quest to tidy up his home mansion after a proper bender, he’ll have to visit every last nook and corner while trying to find a collection of misplaced items. One such location will be the mansion’s attic, containing a strange snake creature among other hazards. But the most deadly killer is an unseen one, lurking beneath the game’s code. Due to a misplaced arrow graphic being inadvertently positioned outside of the screen buffer within a programming address, other multiple sections of the game’s code are overwritten and corrupted in the system memory, thereby causing errors in the definition of — look, never mind all that jargon. The long short of it is, the moment you enter the screen titled “The Attic,” a bug in the program ends up making key portions of the game now inaccessible (with certain screens going so far as to kill you instantaneously on visiting them), and thus rendering the game unbeatable. This is just one of a whole heaping load of bugs present in the game (all fully documented on this page), but seems to be the single-most damning in terms of being game-breaking.

Hilariously, on being called out for this oversight by popular ZX Spectrum enthusiast publication Your Spectrum, the developers at Software Projects had an excuse cooked up to try and frame the bug as some sort of intended feature! Later down the line, Software Projects would issue a proper apology, and series of “POKE” commands that players could enter into their system in order to fix this issue. But I’ll be damned if trying to pass it off to consumers that the issue with their buggy game is somehow on their end isn’t just an admirably cruel bit of developer BSing:

“Each time we walked into certain rooms, Willy lost all his lives. It was time for a frantic phone call to Software Projects’ Alan Morton. ‘Ahah’, said Alan, ‘you didn’t by any chance visit The Attic did you?’ Sure ’nuff, we had – and very proud we were at the time. ‘Well, that’s just a little something we put in to make it a bit more difficult’, came the heavily understated reply. (The feeling our end is that it’s a bug being turned into an asset – but who knows, we could be wrong!)” ~ Your Spectrum. June 1984, Issue 4.

1. Bubble Bobble Revolution (North American release)

Codemasters / Dreams Co. Ltd., 2006

We top off our list with an entry in a veritable classic games franchise, as developed by a team apparently ill-equipped to assume the mantle. 2006’s Bubble Bobble Revolution for the Nintendo DS [as released in North America] is something of a disaster from the get-go, boasting a truly hideous cover that does a disastrous artistic disservice to perennial protagonists Bob and Bub. Seriously, I encourage y’all to expand the accompanying image here and really take in every square inch of it, before Googling an image of one of the original arcade Bubble Bobble flyers and wondering where it all went wrong. Of course, this is only the wretched window dressing to a thoroughly mediocre, and ultimately outright broken game cartridge.

As you progress through Bubble Bobble Revolution’s main campaign (titled “New Version”), you’ll notice a handful of stages that come and go without your so much as encountering a single enemy. Like, you’ll literally load into the stage, loiter around for a couple of seconds, and be suddenly whisked away to the next. Certainly a curious bit of design, but honestly not an entirely unwelcome reprieve from some pretty poorly-designed levels and puzzles. By the time you reach level 30 of 100 though, something particularly odd happens. According to the game’s own precedent, every 10th stage is meant to present you with a boss to be beaten before you progress to the next set. Only, in level 30, no such boss appears. In fact, not much of anything appears, other than your own character and several of the stage elements. And unlike previous levels that the game saw fit to have you skip, you’ll be stuck on this level forever, with no means of forcing it forward. That’s a record 70% of the story mode rendered inaccessible, and a big ol’ red flag that this North American version of the game went entirely untested prior to finalization and shipping.

Needless to say, games news and review outlets were quick to pick up on this story, and rightly savaged the title for it in their attempts to alert consumers. GameSpot’s Frank Provo would be forced to open a review noting that “One of the games included with Bubble Bobble Revolution is a genuine classic. The other is so plagued with glitches that it can’t even be finished.” GoNintendo would later report an instance of a consumer reaching out to publisher Codemasters regarding the issue, and receiving an official response confirming that “all of the cartridges that have been shipped in North America are faulty.” Eventually, a bug-fixing revision for the game would be released with the intent of replacing existing copies on store shelves; but the damage had already been done, and it’s impossible to say for certain that all the defective copies were properly swapped out. Even the addition of a bonus game (the previously-released Rainbow Islands Revolution) was unlikely to overcome the overwhelmingly negative initial reception, and thus the game would cement its place on Wikipedia’s prestigious “List of video games notable for negative reception.” A fitting punishment.

FUN FACT: This also marks the second appearance for one Dreams Co. Ltd. on the Bad Game Hall of Fame; as they were responsible as well for 2007’s Spy Games: Elevator Mission on the Wii. And considering that game was originally intended as an entry in the Elevator Action series, we can call Dreams Co. two-for-two on the whole “classics reimagined” sub-genre.


Snow, Blake. “Why most people don’t finish video games.” CNN. August 17, 2011. Web.
“Join the Jet Set.” Your Spectrum. June 1984, Issue 4. Print. (Digital copy available)
Provo, Frank. “Bubble Bobble Revolution Review.” GameSpot. October 11, 2006. Web.
‘rawmeatcowboy.’ “Bubble Bobble Revolution DS Production Issues Confirmed.” GoNintendo. October 14, 2006. Web.

Cassidy is the curator of a bad video game hall of fame. Whether you interpret that as "a hall of fame dedicated to bad video games" or as "a sub-par hall of fame for video games" is entirely up to you. Goes by "They / Them" pronouns.

Genuine cowpoke.

Contact: E-mail | Twitter

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Boogawho?

A “fun” note is that the C64 version of Jet Set Willy was also impossible to finish, due to different bugs.